the love of family...

my youngest brother got married this weekend. beautiful wedding, beautiful bride, an incredible amount of family pride and family love. ian was the ringbearer - and made me a very happpy daddy when he sprinted down the aisle to be in my arms. i suspect that if you asked the bride and groom, they'd say it was a perfect wedding. it certainly was from my vantage point...

this is a tough post to write, because i don't want to make a beautiful day about my own feelings. but the weekend wasn't without it's difficult moments. i had a bout of emotions during the reception, emotions that caught up with me over the course of the weekend. it was the first wedding i've attended in the last eight or ten years that i attended date-less. i stood at the altar with both of my brothers - each of whom was in my wedding and i theirs - and felt pride for them and disappointment in my lot in life. none of the expanded family asked about k or my situation, but i wondered what or if they were thinking about it. it was a celebration of a beautiful couple, and i couldn't help at times but feel out of place in a small but acute way. when i did fall into a brief self-pity episode during the reception, though, i found help climbing out from carrie, a wet-eyed dance, and reassurance from a sister who knew in her own way what i was going through. thank you, carrie. it meant more than you know...
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on a different note: happy birthday yesterday to my dear friend greenfish. it was a kick-ass birthday week, it was fun celebrating you, and it wasn't ridiculous in any way! i think i speak for the rest of the office when i say we can't wait until next year...